Chapter 5: Dying and Death

Death is a tough subject for anyone. Liberman says that when it comes to death and dying you shouldn't care about what others say when it come to making a decision for you parent, go with your gut feeling and trust your self. There is really no real way to prepare for death itself, but you should have a plan as far as funeral arrangements and financial costs. Emotionally and physically everyone handles death differently. It is important that you realize that your extended family and friends are grieving as well, and to be considerate of their needs. I remember when my grandmother died, it was expected because she was ill, however, it still hit me that I would never see her again, and I just wanted to be alone for awhile, before I talked and hung out with my friends. Realizing that death is ultimately out of your hands, and that you can't blame yourself, is important. As well as knowing that there will be emotions, and that there is only so much that we can do to make our parent comfortable in their last day. In the end days I believe we just have to be their for our parents and whatever they need help them to the best of our abilities in making sure that they get the best care and everything they need. However, we are also limited in that area, because we can only do whatever our parent accepts and whether or not they understand what is happening to them. I remember when my grandmother died, my mother was strong for the most part, when she actually did breakdown, I just listened and asked her if she needed anything, and her church family was there for her the whole time as well. Grief is an experience that no one looks forward to and it takes time to deal with, its a process just as anything else in dealing with an aging parent. I think that as long as we take time to listen and just go day by day in the end days we can make our parent comfortable and as happy as possible.

Leslie-Ann Ellington